What Should I Do if My Son or Daughter Asks Me for Money or to Pay Their Bills?
It’s going to be frustrating and stressful because you’re going to want to not pay any of it. And you’re going to think that the tough love approach is going to make them snap out of it. For me, personally, if my loved one is struggling, I want them to still have a phone so I can call them. I want them to still have a phone so if they make the decision to call for help, they can call for help. If they want to eat, then I’m going to invite them over to eat because then they still have that relationship with me, and I know they’re getting food. Because I know that a big concern for a lot of people is, “If I give them money, they’re just going to use it to get what they want.” Set the boundary by saying, “Hey, I’m not going to give you money, but I can offer you the food since you’re saying you need food.” “Hey, we can meet at this restaurant,” or “Hey, I’m going to cook you a meal.” Those are better boundaries than sending them off.